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BIZZY BLANCO PRESENTS: THE BIZZY AWARDS (DID YOUR FAV ARTIST WIN?) #BizzyAwards

20 Dec


The stars are in the building as we recognize the industry’s most notorious players in 2011. Nobody was more excited than me when I was choosing the winners to the categories below. So without further adieu I give you the 2011 Bizzy Awards…. Enjoy 🙂

Nene Leakes ‘I’m Very Rich Award’ – Soulja boy

This guy has had it all in 2011 it’s just that he was the only one who knew he had it. From his imaginary luxury jets to being busted on drug and weapon charges to having his music owned by someone other than himself, hip hop’s Richie Rich saw his stock rise and hit rock bottom. This award was presented in great Nene fashion because pretending to have something you don’t sounds a whole lot better the next day on the blogs…

Chris Brown ‘Look At Me Now Award’- Beyoncé

Who doesn’t like watching Queen Beyoncé shake that Houston money maker for the masses? She was everywhere in 2011 but it was what she was hiding that really had us intrigued. After announcing to the world she would be birthing the successor to the Jay-Bey dynasty many of us were left wondering if she was indeed preggers. Her stomach has grown,  deflated and rose again like sweet baby Jesus time on Easter Sunday. A popular feeder for the entertainment blogs and magazines, Beyonce kept us all on “baby bump” watch. The ‘Look At Me Now’ award didn’t deserve to be with anybody but King B.

Tyler Perry ‘Why Did I Get Married Award – Kim Kardashian & Kris Humpries

Kim and Kris were destined to be the American version of Will and Kate. They had all the fixings to be royalty, however even the biggest media whore on the planet was ready to stop production on her storybook wedding. After realizing the Prince she married was really a frog, Kim decided it was best she closed up shop and send Kris packing. Isn’t it wonderful that Kim is starring in ‘Tyler Perry’s The Marriage Counselor’?. …How ironic.

The Hand That Rocks The Cradle Award – Adele

As the old William Ross Wallace poem goes… The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world and no other person has defied those odds and shook the foundation of Billboard anymore than Adele. With the best selling album of the year and a whopping 4x platinum on her sophomore set to date, Adele’s year couldn’t have ended anymore sweeter. When Beyoncé was making ‘Girls (Run The World) she was secretly paying homage to one of her favorite singers whom she credits as a voice from heaven. Adele we will allow you to thank the masses and the band won’t play any music until you’ve gracefully finished your acceptance speech..

Sasha Fierce Reloaded Award – Kelly Rowland

After Beyoncé announced she was had retired her alter ego, Kelly Rowland decided to use her sister’s old wigs, shoes, and dancing routines to ignite her own Sasha Fierce while promoting her ‘Here I Am’ album . Not only did using SF enhance Kelly’s image but it did a lot for her live performance’s as well.. Did you catch her slow grind it at the BET Awards? Kelly had really turned up the heat inside her cold ass apartment and allowed SF to breath life back into her career. Just like Mary Poppins had instructed ‘Just a spoon full of Fierce helps the career from going down’….. n the most delightful way…. 

Welcome Back Kotter Award – T.I.

From jail… to home.. to jail again… to finally being free, T.I. has definitely seen his fair share of hard time… but through redemption Clifford Harris is once again an upstanding member of society. Since being released from jail the Kang is home and his future couldn’t be any brighter. With a book, album, and a reality series currently underway who would have thought coming home from doing a bid could yield so many benefits. We hope that the ‘Welcome Home Party’ will last forever and he and Tiny can set positive examples for their budding household…

The Lady Gaga I’m So Different Award – Nicki Minaj/Cee-lo Green

If there were any two celebs who constantly turn heads with their fashion sense then Nicki Minaj and Cee-lo come to mind..From Cee-lo’s outrageous award show get ups to Nicki’s takeover of fashion week music aside it’s what they were wearing that kept most people talking both good and bad. Lady Gaga couldn’t make it but she left some dead possum fur and a old Labelle wig for the winners to fight over…

Stop, Drop, and Roll Award – Meeka Claxton

Remember when they gave you this advice in school if a fire ever started in your home? Apparently Meeka Claxton is too new school and didn’t get the memo. Usually we give out awards for people who perform well in the category but this time we will just give her the trophy out of love and the fact they dropped her Basketball Wives all together. After a few snide remarks and back alley talks later Meeka Claxon met fist to face and not in a good way. Maybe paying attention in school or listening to Beyonce’s Best Thing I Never Had would have allowed Meeka to have dodged a bullet….

Swagga Jack Life Time Achievement Award – Beyoncé Presented by Khia

Often inspired Beyoncé often channels her creative juices and even those of others inside her music, performances, and videos. It’s no surprise that many people call her out for stealing and jacking their concepts without the proper permission. Even rapstress/resident Vlogger Khia and self-proclaimed Queen of the South called out Bey on Twitter claiming Mrs. Carter stole her video treatment for ‘My Neck My Back’ in association with the ‘Party’ video. Make no mistake stolen or not Bey can turn a box of lucky charms into a pot of gold with the snap of her creole fingers and you will continue to be entertained! Always Bey Inspired.. that’s the lesson for today.

I’m Pinky… Nukka Award’ – Larry Merchant

It takes a lot of guts to stand up for what you believe in, so Larry Merchant challenging Floyd Mayweather to a fight like it was 1958 shouldn’t seem odd or far fetched. Larry’s remarks and not so hidden shade could be felt all the way to Iwo Jima and Floyd Money Mayweather didn’t take too kindly to the icy cold daggers that were being thrown in his direction. After declaring Merchant ‘Didn’t Know Sh*t’ Larry challenged Mayweather to a fight which he later claimed was just him being caught up in  the moment… Oh how do I love thee

The Bishop Don Juan Entertainer Of The Year – Herman Cain

Big pimpin/spending cheese is something Big Daddy Cain knows all to well about. Despite his attempt to set up shop inside the White House, the presidential hopeful became known for the care of his former female associates which usually came along with sex according to a few of his accusers. Put your vote in my ballet/this my diner I’m Cain and you are??? All accusers insert your name here____________. Even though he suspended his campaign the panty droppa bed rocka still plans on pimpin well into 2012… CHURCH!

hope you enjoyed the laughs… Can’t wait until what awaits us in 2012… Happy New Year…

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2 Responses to “BIZZY BLANCO PRESENTS: THE BIZZY AWARDS (DID YOUR FAV ARTIST WIN?) #BizzyAwards”

  1. Tony Rice December 23, 2011 at 12:57 pm #

    Weak at Meeka Claxton!

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. HAPPY HOLIDAYS FROM BIZZY BLANCO…. « BizzyBlanco.com | More Than Just The Stars - December 23, 2011

    […] feel free to check the archives and visit some of my awesome post of the past. Also check out the Bizzy Awards, my look back at some of 2011′s most interesting people…. Have a safe and relaxing […]

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